What I Do #3: Breaking It Down
you want to get something done, as a coach, I help you break it down into parts-
and find the roadblocks that may have previously been obscured. They
might be the apparently tiny or practical bits; or they may be about
your values or desires or motivation. Here's an area where we really
get into the ADHD bits; we can spot the elements of getting something
done that are affected by ADHD together.
For example, a typical assumption is that if I'm not accomplishing my goal, it might be because I'm not motivated or I'm not trying hard enough. But for someone with ADHD- and sometimes for other people too- motivation may not be the major factor. It might be that you're not seeing all the steps involved between start and finish, so you don't understand why you're not getting all the way to done in one go. Or, you're not noticing the parts that are hard. If you want to send a thank-you note, getting to the store to buy the card (or the post office for a stamp, or the mailbox to mail it) are examples of major ADHD stoppers. Without breaking it down, many of us are prone to thinking we're just failing at social interactions because we don't seem to get the card in the mail– and that is pretty discouraging. But once it's broken down, it's possible to figure out how to get the pieces done, or choose another way of fullfilling our goal (being gracious without a thank-you card for example) entirely.